Friday, February 20, 2009

Pitch and Sway

It depends on the moment, but lately there is very little still. We live in cycles of motion, pitching and listing, then swaying and lolling. I cannot say that I prefer one over the other, but I am clearly dazed, unable to really root myself in anything but the anticipation of the next propulsion.

Briar huffing, bossing Avery.
Briar writing, asking, surging ahead.

Avery pouting, lamenting that she is not in school.
Avery gasping for breath between body wracking guffaws, Avery exclaiming, "By. My. Self!"

Finley scaling stairs. Finley exploring outlets.
Finley finding itty bitty bits of plastic. Finley doing and doing.

I watched the numbers on the calender whiz past.

I haven't written.

It ricocheted off the hampers of clothes waiting to be folded.

My blogs are gathering dust.

It clanged against the dishes in the sink.

I am ashamed by the longing for a moment.

It stared back at me in the mirror as I tried to slip contacts over my bloodshot eyes.

I've been dipping my toe back in, back to primping, back to smiling and back here. My writing. My passion.

It is here where I find my footing. Jess called it the season of motherhood. I love that, I really do. And so even as it feels like a marathon that I am sprinting (Thanks for that, Janet) I am slowing to a walk, ambling even, to dash notes here.

My girls, my days, my everything, tucked safely in these words I find as I listen to the rhythm of naptime breathing or the ringing and clattering of doll house playing. My time, now and forever.

Capturing a bit of magic for a rainy day.

Special thanks to my mom for the pictures, all taken during our wondrous visit.

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Lisa Wheeler Milton said...

We savor every word you can spare, and understand the absence when you are swallowed whole by that gorgeous life you are carving out for yourself.

Be blessed.

jennie said...

It's good to have you back :) Looks like you had a wonderful time!

Oh, The Joys said...

If you give over to being in it mostly for yourself, your sanity, your memory, your posterity... it is all good.

Amy said...

Oh so good to have you back.

BetteJo said...

Glad to see pics again - I cannot believe how fast the girls are growing!

Okay that was original.

flutter said...

The beauty of you, your life, your girls...your love with your again.

Just gives me great hope for the world

Maggie, Dammit said...

You are so amazing.

Janet said...

I loved the Season of Motherhood post, too. Some days the season feels like interminable winter; sometimes it feels like warm spring sunshine. In the end, it is what you make of it.

Nice to see you again. But, really, nice to see you whenever you have the time. Your priorities are firmly settled in the right place, lady.

Amy Y said...

You have such a beautiful family!

amanda said...

the beauty you live in is breathtaking.

Anonymous said...

Thank you from the depths of my soul for coming. I am cherishing every memory, floating on the high of being blessed with such a beautiful and brilliant family. I am so, so lucky! The girls are elegant and radiant, full of love, poise and grace.

trampoline design said...

Glad you found a moment, babe. You deserve it.

Colleen said...

I feel like you're writing about what I'm going through now. Life is just whirling past. Time is flying. I can't seem to catch a minute... but at the same time I'm loving the time.

Colleen said...

Oh, and the blog... you can see how my blog is suffering.